On the sea of life some people seem to float adrift like a wreckage, directed by the tide, while others seem to be fully conscious and mindful of their lives, aware of what they are doing and why they are doing it. In terms of mental health being consciously aware is extremely important.
According to a passage mentioned in the book “The Fragrant Mind” by Valerie Ann Worwood, Dr. Dean Ornish, very famous in medical history for showing that coronary heart disease can be reversed by using a combination of meditation, group therapy and stress reduction techniques, says that “If you believe you have some control over your life and that you have the ability to make choices instead of being the passive recipient, or the victim of bad luck or bad genes, then you are more likely to make changes that are going to do you good in terms of both your behavior and of the direct effects of your mind on your body.”
In the Oxford dictionary the meaning of the word aware is defined as having knowledge of something. So in the context of self-awareness it means having knowledge of self. To be conscious, to have knowledge of what one is doing or intending to do. If one goes through life without being aware, our thoughts and feelings are influenced by the people that surround us in our daily lives. Then we no longer have dominion over our own choices and our own lives. We get entangled in our own web of daily existence, jobs, relationships, obligations, ambitions, other people, and financial pursuits. Instead of exercising free will we substituted it with programmable schedule. And it is completely natural. Sometimes we lose touch with ourselves and that’s ok.
But we don’t want to be a victim in our lives. We want to live our life the way we want and go forward in the direction of where we want to go and not where everyone else is going. When we become conscious of our thoughts and feelings, we recognize the negative patterns and behaviors that create problems for us and we stop blaming others for our misfortunes and their faults. By empowering our thoughts and being mindful of them, we can modify our behavior based on facts and observations.
The more we recognize our negative patterns, the more we get connected to our true self and realize the burden of carrying the feelings, grudges and thoughts that no longer serve us. Self-Awareness can help us recognize when we are becoming depleted and in need of self-care. The more aware we are the more healing occurs.
MY JOURNEY OF SELF-AWARENESS AND SELF-HEALING
A few years back I was studying for my post grad in Engineering and it was the most stressful period of my life. I was doing something that I didn’t love or enjoy doing. Moreover, I was only doing it because it was required of me to pursue further studies. And after completing the degree I spent another two years studying something which subconsciously I had no intention of pursuing but of course I didn’t know it at that time. I was relentlessly going in the direction which wasn’t meant for me and I was too ignorant to even notice the signs.
When repeated failure got to me I was frustrated, depressed and anxiousness filled me. I couldn’t achieve anything and it was this failure that made me look at my life, my choices and myself with a closer inspection. I knew that if I wanted to achieve something in my life I had to work on myself. I had to know myself. I also had an incredible reserve of hope and faith in the Universe and always believed that things happen for a reason. And so I started to let go. I let go of any kind of expectations I had put on myself.
I let go of all the ways I was hard on myself for not achieving the things I had planned. I let go of all the expectations others had of me. And in letting go of all the unwanted burden I created space for my authentic self to bloom and felt my true self blossoming and coming to terms with my new reality. A reality where I gave myself permission to release all the things that no longer served me, where I can be whoever I wanted to be and to break the chains binding me to such a limited world without any creative imagination. I wanted to make my own path, follow my heart, listen to my soul, to find my true purpose. But how would I have found my true purpose If I didn’t even know what I was looking for. But most importantly, how could I have known what I wanted to do if I didn’t even know who I was.
I wanted to break free, to know my real self and awaken my inner wise woman.
I took a break from all my plans and began to enjoy my life without any regrets. I didn’t worry about my failed career or thought what I should do to earn a living. I stopped thinking about my Engineering degrees and instead focused on myself. I started meditation to listen to my intuition and inner voice and gain inner knowledge about myself and to be still in the environment full of chaos and expectations.
I started shadow journaling to know myself better, to know my fears, insecurities and weaknesses, my strengths, values and the things I love and enjoy. I also practiced gratitude journaling for abundance and joy. I wrote about my negative feelings and analyzed them to achieve new perspectives. . I did self-reflection journaling to know what I truly wanted and what reality I needed to create for myself. I started positive affirmation journaling to focus on creating a new reality for me because I truly believed that I am the only one who can create my own reality.
I started using Essential oils regularly for my anxiety and to keep me calm and serene which really supported me in my journey of self-awareness. I used lavender and orange to keep my nerves calm throughout the day and lavender and jasmine during the night to help me sleep. I used Essential oils during journaling and meditation to keep my mind positive and focused. In my self-awareness journey I not only became consciously aware of my negative thoughts and feelings that were holding me back, but also I figured out that I had the power to control my thoughts and redirect them towards more positive way of thinking.
And in doing so I finally started to heal. My feelings of worthlessness, of not achieving anything finally started to dissolve and I started healing from my trauma of all the stress I put myself through during those years of studying. I began to recognize thought patterns and negative voices in my head and labelled them as “does not exist in reality” and started transforming them into more positive and constructive voice. It’s not that the negative thoughts or voices can be killed permanently, it’s not possible because they are supposed to be there. They are our defense system put in our mind for self-preservation purposes but that doesn’t mean that they are always real. We just have to recognize them and label them and move past them. It definitely takes practice and patience and a little kindness and compassion towards yourself.
For me the most important journey would be finding my own unique self and the truth of who I truly am authentically. But it’s a journey nonetheless, you can’t just answer some questions and figure yourself out. It’s an emotional ride, lots of bumps of guilt, depressive black holes of regrets, and a never-ending cycle of self-criticism. But when we really get to know ourselves, when we really pay attention to what our soul needs and is and our true purpose, then we are truly awakened and alive in every possible way.
The way we look at ourselves, the way we feel about ourselves, our whole perspective changes. And when we change the way we look at things, the things change. But be mindful I am not talking about changing ourselves, I am talking about changing our perception of the way things appear to us. Things aren’t always as they seem and we can misunderstand many things even our own thoughts and this is what I am asking you to pay attention to. When we are more aware of our thoughts we understand better how to recognize our feelings and how to respond. And in turn we are aware of others’ feelings and what they stem from. We truly get to be free of all those negative thinking and focus on what is real and tangible.
In the journey of finding my true self I also found my purpose. And it was the best thing I did for myself because here I am doing what I always wanted and enjoy it immensely. I get to work with essential oils every day and help others who are struggling to get through their day with the help of my experiences and my knowledge of essential oils and how to incorporate them into self-care rituals and use them safely. Remember, essential oils can support you just like meditation, journaling, yoga and exercise, but you have to make a conscious choice to rise above the daily and mundane existence and find your true self to live more soulfully and love your life.
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